Just a Normal Tuesday

***Trigger Warning: this book deals with the subject of suicide therefore it is prevalent in my review***

I am going to start off by saying this isn’t my typical review. This isn’t a typical book.

When I started to  Just a Normal Tuesday by Kim Turrisi I thought that Kai, the main character, was going to solve a mystery and that her sister’s suicide was just a cover up of murder but this wasn’t that type of book at all. This story is raw, emotional and very serious. We follow Kai from discovering her sister’s (Jen) suicide, through her grief, anger and self destruction. At one point I thought the story wasn’t going to end well and Kai would do what her sister did, kill herself. As she hits about rock bottom her friends rally around her and her family takes her to a grief camp where she comes to terms with her feelings about her sister’s death and finds friendship, love and purpose while she’s there. The ending is not a complete happily ever after because nothing will bring back the dead and there are no answers to answer why Jen decided to end her life.

Depression and suicide are close subjects to me. I have suffered depression more often than not throughout my life. There have been times where I just wanted  not exist anymore sometimes these episodes would be triggered something not. My bio dad committed suicide a few years ago just before his last grandchild was born. In his case, I honestly interstate why. He was homeless and in poor health and had struggled off and on with substance abuse all his life. He had his demons and he didn’t keep them hidden like many do. But I was left to pick up the pieces and figure out what to do. No one prepares you on how to deal with arrangements for the dead, especially if there were no will nor wishes laid out. Not when it is sudden. Just a year later my favorite actor, Robin Williams, committed suicide as well. I’ve never been one to feel truly connected to a celebrity and never truly mourned them until Robin’s death. It’s a strange feeling when someone you saw as brilliant, funny and happy commits suicide and all their secrets and pain become public knowledge. You are left wondering how someone so seemingly happy really wasn’t. So suicide has touched my life directly and indirectly and this book hit me right at the epicenter of feels.

Jen, a seemingly happy young woman, sends three letters; one for each of her parents and one to her sister, Kai. As Kai reads her letter her world is tumbled upside down, this was he sisters suicide note to her Kai. She takes off in hopes that she can save her sister but it is already too late her sister had committed suicide by downing a bunch of pills with alcohol. The tragedy that is suicide creates a new reality of grief and pain for Kai and her family. Not only does it destroy Kai on many levels it also puts an enormous strain on her remaining family. Kai starts down a path that is very destructive, taking pills, drinking and skipping classes. She passes out on her sister’s grave in deep grieving and her friends take her home with warning that she needs to lay off the bad habits, she doesn’t take heed and drinks more and pops more pills, then confess the blind rage. She tops her room apart and hacks ofc her hair before passing out again. Finally her parents see what their own grief has kept them from seeing and take Kai to a grief camp. She doesn’t want to go but eventuality promises her parents that she will give it a try. And it does help her come to terms with her anger and grief. She also meets new friends and a new boyfriend. At the end of the book Kai still has no answers as to why Jen committed suicide and h still needs to come to terms with the fact she won’t ever have those answers. She also finds a purpose for her life and plans to comeback as a camp grief counselor.

It is really hard for me to put any quantitative rating on this book. The Book was fairly well written but there were errors that an editor would fix, as this was an ARC. Technically it’s a good book. But I feel that saying this was a great book may be misleading. It is NOT completely happily ever after. This book was deep. This book made me raw. This book made me feel. And THAT is what truly makes a good book.

If you or if thou think anyone you know is in danger of committing suicide i urge you to get help.

Everyone Plays A Role In Suicide PreventionGET HELP NOW. Get resources for yourself or be the difference for a loved one by offering support and understanding.HELP YOUR LOCAL CENTER. Lifeline centers range across the U.S. and rely on state and local funding to operate. JOIN THE NETWORK. PROMOTE THE LIFELINE

Remember YOU CANNOT BE REPLACED.

Until next time my little booklings, au revoir!

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